# Need Your Help



## willie226 (Apr 4, 2006)

To the Outback family

This morning I heard my mom dislocated her hip last night and was sent to the hospital and they popped the hip back in place well during the night because of the medication she got really sick in the night so they addmitted her and now she is in the hospital being treated with pneumonia too. My dad has a really bad case of Alzheimer's disease and up until now my mom was taking care of him. He was leaving the stove on and walking off same with the water and can not carry on a coversation. Within the past few months he has really got worse and now this with my mom. Both of my parents are in there early 80s
and they don't want to go in assisted living home but they can't take care of the house either. 
We can't convince them. I am hoping that when my mom gets better that we can convince them that would be the best for both of them. So if you could keep my family and parents in your prayers and thoughts in hopes that we can get them to make that right descision. It would be so much appreciated.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this. I will keep you all posted.

Thanks Again
Willie and Family


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## wolfwood (Sep 19, 2005)

Hi Willie,

You most certainly have our good wishes & positive energy. We went through this with Kath's folks and then with my Dad. Fortunately (?), both of Kath's folks were in various stages of dimentia and both were very submissive personalities. Their 3 daughters eventually told them they had no choice and they went relatively agreeably. No such case with my Dad. It took several years after Mom's passing for him to even agree to go look at facilities. Unfortunately, I had to agree that what we saw was NOT what was conveyed before we got there and i wouldn't have been comfortable with any of the places - he'd have nothing to do with any further discussion after that.

Dad eventually had a pretty bad event and I was able to convince the doctor to "order" him to NOT live alone - that meant either an assisted living facility or a live-in Nurse. You might consider speaking with their doctor(s) - particularly now - AND with your local Visiting Nurse Association (even if this doesn't result in live-in assistance - it could result in a daily or several-times-a-week visit from someone who will cook, clean, check on meds, etc.....AND give your mom a much needed break!)

This is a tough time and there's little in life that prepares US for the time when WE become our parents' caretakers. Be gentle with yourselves, too....


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## 'Ohana (May 20, 2007)

Dear Willie and Family,
Unfortunately we've been there and done that. Even more unfortunately there will come a time when your mother realizes she cannot care for your father any longer and you will quickly have to get them a solution. The caregiver often suffers health problems due to the amount of care required by the Alzheimer's patient. All you can do is go day to day with their situation and be supportive and be able to act fast when they need your help. My situation was opposite whereby my mother had Alzheimers very badly (same thing - wandering out of the house, etc.) and my father had serious heart and lung problems. One day my father realized he couldn't take care of mom with Alzheimers so my husband and I scrambled to get mom into a nursing home within a couple of days. Bottom line, Willie is that you take one day at a time and get the support of your family behind you to handle this. It is very difficult on so many levels and our family will pray for your family. This occurred in our life 7 years ago and since then they have both passed on. I wish you much luck. During that time in our lives camping wasn't an option, we were busy 24/7 tending to their needs and we were happy to do it.

With much support,
Hope


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## mswalt (Sep 14, 2004)

That's tough, Willie. I feel for you.

Hope everything works out for good.

Mark


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## Oregon_Camper (Sep 13, 2004)

Wishing both your parents the best...

And also goodness for you...keeping your family and then your parents afloat takes a lot of time and patience.

Best of luck!


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## drobe5150 (Jan 21, 2005)

Willie & Family:

prayers are coming your way.
like others have said, been there done that .... but twice.
first my grandfather with parkinsons, my grandmother finally had to hire a care giver, he stayed with her till my gramps finally succumed.
and Katies Dad with full blown alzheimers, both Katie & her sister were able to convince their mom to hire a caregiver, he too stayed to the very end
anyway, hopefully when your mom recovers you will be able to convince her the same thing, it is way better than sending a loved one off to one of those board & care homes.

good luck & again prayers are coming your way.

darrel & katie


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## Lady Di (Oct 28, 2005)

Willie, You have the prayers.

Unfortunately there are hardly ever any easy answers in these situations.

My FIL just died after lingering for four years with my MIL caring for him. She did a good job, but was REALLY stressed.


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## skippershe (May 22, 2006)

Willie,

I'm so sorry to hear about your parents. You certainly haven't had a very good time of it lately and I hope that you are able to get everything sorted out. Hopefully, your mom will come to realize that she just can't do it all herself and will accept help in a new living situation.

Our prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time,


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## h2oman (Nov 17, 2005)

That's pretty brutal willie. We'll be praying.


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## 4ME (Sep 11, 2006)

Prayers headed your way! You sure have had your share of hurdles this last year.I pray and hope the next year makes up for it some!


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## Brian (Jan 25, 2004)

Willie,

Thanks for your openness and willingness to reach out for support!

There are many times in our lives when we, "Do what we gotta do", but also can feel a peace in our hearts when we feel

like our burdens are carried(through prayer and enchouragement) by other caring people.

My family will be lift your family up daily!

Keep us posted and never lose hope.

Brian, Bonnie,Erin,Rachel


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## fspieg (Jul 31, 2006)

Willie:

Our prayers are with you. My brother and I were faced with a similar situation. I think we all go through this sooner or later.


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## RizFam (Feb 25, 2006)

Sending my prayers & positive energy to your Mom & your family Willie.

Tami


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## camping canuks (Jan 18, 2007)

You are in our thougths and prayers


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## nonny (Aug 14, 2005)

Willie,

My mother has Alzheimer's, Stage 6. My brother oversaw her care until his death in September. Twice, he moved her into facilities believing they had levels of care available. The first was nothing but a high priced apartment. The second has care available from outside agencies and has some safety features, as well as providing all 3 meals and housekeeping. Neither was appropriate for my mother at the time she moved in. The first provided nothing and she needed what the second now affords her. Unfortunately, now she needs to be in a safer, more structured program with levels of care suited to her needs. I am in the process of obtaining guardianship so that I can facilitate more care now and a move as soon as possible. My mother is not submissive but is also not able to make rational decisions. When the choice is made for your family members, please look to the future so multiple moves do not have to occur. Any transition is hard on those with dementia.

My prayers are with all of you!


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